art is not a handicraft

"Art is not a handicraft, it is the transmission of feeling the artist has experienced." -Leo Tolstoy

I tried something new recently: I am applying to have an art exhibition. My CV is sadly lacking in what art exhibition folks look for --things like training and prior experience. I have had training --lots of it --but I never went to art school for reasons I've explored prior to now. My prior experience is called life and fiddling around with whatever I could in the spare moments not filled with all of the other things I was expected to do.

There was a period of time that I won't go into where I didn't get out much --an understatement, but I don't like to think about it and  people prefer uplifting redemption stories to stories about why the redemption was needed. The point is, I didn't get out much and my personal world was limited to the left side of a couch, occasionally venturing into the kitchen or going for walks.

During that time, I found things I could do in very small spaces. One of those things was papier-mâché because it cost nothing and I could use things around the house. I made my son's mask for his Halloween costume. Another thing I did was papercutting. Part of an old egg carton could be turned easily into a bird puppet.

And one more thing I did was sew.

I discovered tivaevae, beautiful quilts from the Cook Islands that women grow up learning to make, and tried to emulate it (poorly) by myself. I made a giant floor pillow out of an old curtain, sewn by hand (my fingers still hurt thinking about pushing that needle through that thick canvas). And I made the letters up above for a project inspired by my work at school with literacy and those old magnet letters that people use on refrigerators.

With all apologies to Tolstoy, sometimes art is a handicraft and handicraft is art. Traditionally, that has been the avenue left open to women to express themselves. And there's plenty of feeling there. 

a bunch of old bs

Heads up: everything in the next section I am about to write is bullshit. Don't know why you'd read after that glowing endorsement, but maybe a few of you have a little Pandora in you and want to know what's in that box labeled 'Bullshit' ...

________

The world is for the young. If you're of a certain age and you haven't already established your reputation, you didn't really want it enough, did you? If you're of a certain age and you need or want to start over, you're only embarrassing yourself. You're set in your ways. You can't learn anything new. What could you possibly have to say that's interesting? You're old.

_________

If you are young (we'll define 'young' for our purposes as under the age of 27 --sounds like a nice even number) and think any of the above, then you are setting yourself up for a great big load of disappointment in your later life, guaranteed. You think you know, but you have no idea.

If you are old (28 and up) and think any of that, then stop it. Seriously. Stop. I'm talking as much to myself here as to any of you. 

The world (another term we need to define --I'm in the US, and as everyone knows, we're the center of the universe in our own minds, so what the hell, we'll go with that) prefers the young. We love the precocious. We love prodigies. We loved Coreys Haim & Feldman until they grew up. We do not love messes or baggage or anything other than unbridled enthusiasm on shining faces. If there is a mess, it had better be young and hot and cute because ew.

That doesn't mean the world is right. It means the world likes things wrapped up in neat little packages.

__________

Fuck neat little packages --seriously, fuck them. They're just fancy boxes, aren't they? And fuck the world if it can't handle a mess without calling for it to be taken away.

___________

Despite the angry tone to all of that, I am actually feeling pretty hopeful. 

I've written before about coming late to art and expressing myself. Extensively. Seriously, that sums up about 1/3 of my blog posts, you're welcome --no need to read now. In my explorations into what to do with what I've figured out about my creativity, I've looked up "okay, now what?" and have been greeted with a gaggle of young faces (or faces that may look like mine, but with a long list of credits tattooed on them). It can get discouraging. Baggage weighs me down.

I can't put the baggage down. It's like a scar --I've earned it. It's my baggage. I can carry it smarter, though. I'm all about ergonomic solutions at this stage.

____________

What people aged 28-108 can contribute to the world and to the arts:

• Breadth --life experience is, in fact, experience, and we have more of it
• Perseverance --think Keith Richards (we are all Keith Richards)
• Leadership --a lot of us have had kids, so we've had to learn to lead
• Patience --again, we've had kids
• The Ability to Spot and Call Bullshit --speaks for itself
• Resources --we get jobs while trying to figure stuff out, and we're cantankerous enough to work and create (yes, at the same time)

________________

Do not preemptively assume that you have nothing to contribute to the arts. You have a lot to contribute --what that is may remain to be seen, but you have a lot to contribute. Use your well-earned patience. Persevere, because you know you can do that (Keith Richards lives!). Spot the bullshit, both what the world lays on you and what you lay on yourself. Now is the time. It wasn't before, and that's okay, because you were learning to get to where you are now.

Don't buy the old bullshit. You're not old, you're mature. Now go make whatever the hell you want.

And Happy 2018, when it comes.

personal space camp

Good morning, boys and girls!

This morning's lesson is about personal space. I know, I know --you thought it was going to be on a rocket ship, but it's not that kind of personal space camp.

Personal space is one's body and the immediate space around it. Needs for personal space change from situation to situation, and they may differ from culture to culture. With a stranger, there needs to be more distance; with family and friends, less distance, etc.

Why?

Autonomy.

Autonomy is the idea that each individual is separate. I can't feel what you feel, I don't know what you know, I may like Brussels sprouts and you don't, and so on. Autonomy means you don't have to eat Brussels sprouts if you don't want to. Personal space is one form of autonomy --I am not you or yours, and you are not me or mine. We each have our own space, and physical contact needs to be consensual or it is perceived as an aggression against our autonomy. Those were big words, I know --it just means you don't have to eat Brussels sprouts or get grabbed by anyone if you don't want to.

Well, hello, what's this? A handout from a child's physical exam? What is this doing here? Hmm. Let me read it. Won't be a second ...

"Discuss personal boundaries and acceptable versus inappropriate touch. Let your child know that no one should ask to see/touch their private parts, and no adult should ask for help with their private parts."

Just a little more. You don't mind, do you? Just a moment ...

"If your child is being bullied, be available to listen and support them. Do not blame them. Explain the difference between protecting oneself/getting help and retaliating. Ask your child what they need to feel safe, and talk to the teacher/principal for further support. Let you child know it is okay to say "no" (and explain why) if a friend or bully asks them to do something harmful or scary."

So, boys and girls, if someone touches you without your permission, unless it is to keep you safe, it is wrong. You have permission to say "no". If that person does not accept your "no", they do not accept that you are a person and as such allowed to have autonomy. Therefore, since they do not accept your autonomy, you can feel free not to accept theirs and kick them wherever will hurt most --their autonomous regions! Only to regain your personal space and autonomy, of course.

In all seriousness, we teach this (with the exception of that last part about kicking ...) to children. Surely we can understand something a 7-year old can get? It's not rocket science.