one person's trash ...

"...is another person's treasure."

Finishing the cliché for you. That's the thing about clichés: they're annoying, but everyone knows them for a reason. There's an element of truth in them. They are simplistic, which is where people usually have problems with clichés, but let's not throw out the baby with the bathwater (see what I did there? Yeah ...). Some trash is actually trash --old food that has spoiled & can make you sick if you eat it, for example. But, in a lot of cases, we in the First World miss opportunities because we see things that aren't trash as 'trash'.

A thought popped in my head today, as they often do, & the thought was this:

It takes two hands, 
A vision, & 
Patience
To turn trash 
To treasure.

I think in poems sometimes, which is why I've written it down with strange line breaks. The thought is the same as the cliché, but I was expanding on it. How do some people turn trash to treasure? That's how: work, patience, & an idea. That's it. 

You start with raw material. It might already be fully functional; in that case, it was never trash to start with. It may have been a bit banged up, but that is no reason to throw something away. This goes for any raw material, including human beings & what they have to offer the world. I wonder if I can reuse this soapbox ...? Pretty sure I will.

In other cases, you may have something but you need something else, or you may have something & you need to figure out another way to use it. Here's where you need vision. Here's where you need effort. Here's where you need cardboard.

Yes, cardboard.

I don't want to bore you to tears (too late), so I am including a how-to here. I know! Who knew it would be a twofer??? I did, but you just found out. You're welcome.

I will teach you how to turn this ...

Into this ...

Why? Because I felt like it. I needed a little something pretty in my life because I've been wrestling with sadness a bit these past few days. That's reason enough. If you need something to brighten up your life, you do not need to go out & buy something. 

Let me say that again: if you need something to brighten up your life, you may already have it at hand. Look around you. See things in new ways. This includes all raw materials, including human beings. See? I knew I had another use for that soapbox!

So here are the steps:

1. Open up the box. See what's inside. A lot of cardboard, that's what. What a wonderful resource!

2. Draw circles on it of different sizes, & draw lines so you'll know where to put petals. I winged it because I'm a pantser most of the time; if this causes you anxiety, be precise. There is no one way to do this. It's whatever works for you, & that goes for everything in life. It takes all types.

3. Cut them out --first the circles, then the petals. This can be tedious or soothing, depending how you look at it. It's all in your attitude. I have a hard time with this part because I want them READY NOW! I need to work on patience. This helps.

4. Put them together. I had embroidery floss (yes, I'm one of those people --it's because I try a lot of stuff, so I have things like that lying around). Use what you have. What can hold these pieces together? Be creative! Anxious, precise people: it's okay. You can try something, & if it doesn't work, try something else. It's okay. There is more than one answer here, & it's just cardboard flowers. It's okay. You are working on the executive function of mental flexibility!

5. Enjoy them. Share them. Do whatever you want with them! You made them. There is something satisfying in that: you made them. And you'll notice an extra guy snuck ...sneaked ...snuck? Anyway, an extra guy joined his friends. When you start to try things, & be brave with what you have, it's funny how that seems to spread, & new, unforeseen benefits sneak in (much easier to use that verb in the present tense!).

I stole this idea. It is done in Mexico with tin cans. Again, use what you have. And pay attention when other people do things you like. Ask people about their talents & skills --we all know things other people don't know. It builds community & makes us wiser. I should have used a prettier box, but it's what I had, & that's okay.

In the New Year, here's hoping you can look around you & see all of the treasure life has given you. There is some trash that is truly trash, but for the most part, there are treasures to see, if you look.

Happy New Year!

experience is a great teacher

Everyone can learn.

There. Glad we got that out of the way.

Now we can move onto the details.

In my professional life, I work with a wide variety of learning styles. I work with children, but children are people, too, so everything I've learned working with children can also be applied to adults, in my experience. We're all just grown-up kids, anyway.

Learning is simply acquiring knowledge. It can be done in one of three ways: 

1. you can experience something and retain lessons from the experience; 
2. you can study something and retain lessons from the study; or
3. you can be be taught something and retain lessons from what you are taught.

Today, I've been thinking about experience.

Experience is a great teacher. It is the most basic teacher. If you think about Pavlov's dog, that canine would be a great example of experiential learning. 

Experience shapes behavior: if I do this, then that happens. I like that --I'm going to do it again. I don't like that --not doing that again. That's how early learning happens. It's trial and error until we find something that works. 

As wise as people like to think we are, it still all boils down to that sometimes, especially when basic needs like sleep, food, shelter, companionship, and security aren't being met. Once we find a pattern that works for us, we develop habits. Sometimes, they're good habits; but sometimes, they're bad habits. We do what meets our needs: attention, avoidance, access, or automatic reinforcement (it feels good). 

And, although we can also use our lovely brains to study or to be taught, there is something about experience that takes learning to a new level. 

Think about supervisors you've had. The best supervisors are people who have experienced what they're asking you to do. They know what's realistic to expect. They know what's reasonable and what's possible in theory (read: not going to happen unless all of the variables impacting the experience are favorable).  

Think about the converse. Think about Monday Morning quarterbacks. Think about backseat drivers. It's all very well and good to talk about things in the abstract, but actually having to do them is much harder than talking about doing them. There's this pesky thing about having to use your body to do things and having to account for a variety of variables in real time.

This is not to say there's not a place for study and being taught. There is. It is important to think about why things happen. Those bad habits mentioned before? The only way to break them is to think about them and to explore alternatives to doing them. Those good habits mentioned before? The best way to continue them is to think about them and to see if there's any way to build upon them.

The New Year is coming. We've all had a lot of experiences this year. We've learned from them. Sometimes, this learning is conscious; but sometimes, this learning is unconscious (think of anything you just kept doing without thinking about it --that was learning!). Here's hoping that the New Year brings you good experiences and good learning.

Best wishes.

things I took for granted today

Things I took for granted today: a list

1. I woke up in a bed with a roof over my head.

2. I woke up at 5:30 AM with my alarm but stayed in bed for a few extra minutes because it was warm. I knew I could do this without being late for work.

3. My son has learned how to use an alarm clock and woke himself up independently. This is a newly-learned skill he is interested in doing (???).

4. There was food to eat for breakfast.

5. There was coffee.

6. There was coffee. It bears saying twice!

7. People on Twitter said good morning. It's good to have friends.

8. My place of work is within walking distance of my home. It is in a neighborhood with a low rate of crime and adequate sidewalks.

9. My place of work is the same place my son attends school. I can drop him off for before school care at the same time as I go to work. I know that the day care is safe and clean. I know the people there take care of him.

10. My place of work is safe and clean. The people who work there are friendly and caring.

11. There were enough snacks in my place of work that my lunch was essentially provided from leftovers. These were brought in by coworkers.

12. I could work an 8-hour work day. I only have to have one job in order to make enough to live on.

13. It is Friday and I have a day off tomorrow. I am only required to work five days a week (although I often work more), for fewer than eight hours a day (although I often work more).

14. I could leave work before it got dark. I could walk home with my son.

15. There was food to eat for dinner.

16. I have running water.

17. I have plumbing that functions.

18. I have electricity.

19. I have the Internet. That's how I talked to people on Twitter this morning.

20. My family is doing well. Family members I've been worried about are doing well.

21. I do not live in a war zone, either literal or metaphorical.

22. I've survived to the age of 43.

23. I ate some cookies.

24. I walked on both of my legs. They work.

25. I am relatively pain free.


This list is not comprehensive. I've forgotten things I should be grateful for. I take it for granted that there will be things I forget to remember.

Have a wonderful rest of your day. What did you take for granted today?

hair today, gone tomorrow

Full disclosure: I am sitting here with half a head full of bright pink hair.

See? What you can't see is the other half of my hair. There's a reason for that -which we will come to in a moment.

I generally forget my hair. I know it's there, I wash it, I get it out of my way. Every once in a while, though, I feel like I should do something with it because that's what people do. One year, I cut it all off --& I mean all of it. Another year, I went blonde. And so on. 

Flashback to last night: I ran a Twitter poll to find out what to do with my hair. Yes, I asked other people what I should do. What do you do when you don't know what to do with your hair? Most people said go with an 'unnatural wild color'. That, I haven't done before. Hmmm ...

Through a series of miscommunications resulting from different definitions of the word "blonde", I ended up looking like Lucius Malfoy (according to my 9 year old, who -at one point -seemed to be on the verge of tears and kept repeating, "I'm sorry ..."). So 'wild unnatural color' it was to be after all, but not as planned. The original compromise had been blonde hair with some pink-purple in the front, and now, I looked like Lucius Malfoy. I had wanted to have my safe cake and eat my wild cake, too, or whatever it's called when you want things both ways, and it had backfired --badly.

And I was afraid. Even though I was reassuring my 9 year old, "Don't worry, honey. It's just hair," I was afraid.

I know it grows. I know there's more to people than what they look like. But it looked and looks awful, and for some reason, that fills me with fear. Maybe I'm more hung up on looks than I thought? 

Oh, and I think I forgot to mention one important detail: my son needed to be at a birthday party at 12:45, so we had to stop everything at 12:30 --no matter what the state of hair affairs was --and that was to be that. So pink-purple in the front, Lucius Malfoy in the back with an incomplete haircut is the hair I ended up with as of 12:30.

And I hate it.

But leaving gave me time to think and reflect. 

It is just hair. It is responsible to and for no one. It doesn't hurt anyone if it is different. 

And this situation with my hair is a metaphor for my life. The areas of my life I feel most successful in are the ones I made a decision about and I committed to that decision. I did not do that with my hair. I compromised about something that didn't really require compromise, and I was left feeling horrible. If I want to try pink, I need to try pink. I didn't walk in wanting to try Lucius Malfoy, so I don't need to accept Lucius Malfoy.

It is just hair. It is temporary. One shouldn't be left with regrets when all is said and done. So I am going back, and I'm going to do it right. All pink it will be.

And I can live with that. For now. And we'll see how it goes.

the twitter collection

Everyone who loves Twitter, raise your hand!

*looks around the room, sees only my own hand raised*

Good enough ...

If you are reading this, you are more than likely a writer. I tend to hang with writerly-type folks, who are generally also readerly-type folks. I can't imagine else would want to read my blog, so you must be a writer, reader. Right? Raise your hand if you could follow that.

*looks around the room, sees only my own hand raised*

Good enough ...

My job today is to convince you of something that I've had to convince myself of: using Twitter is, technically, writing. Since I am generally argumentative and unpleasant, I did talk myself into it eventually, if only to get myself to shut up.

Now, I'm going to talk you into it. Why? I feel like writing something random. That, and I'm tired of seeing Twitter guilt (definition: the guilt you feel when you log onto the computer to write, and two hours later, you are still goofing around ...) from writers when I've seen the good things Twitter brings --you are writing. Please hear me out. Remember: I'm generally argumentative and unpleasant. It's best to get it over with.

I have written at length about the social benefits of Twitter in a post written in July entitled, "Strange Praise for Twitter". I believe it is also a useful tool in inspiring creativity. 

The artistic community on Twitter is second-to-none. There is something to be said for hanging around creative types. It makes you more creative, makes you more willing to try things, gives you ideas to expand on, etc. Twitter gives you the added bonus of being able to be anywhere --and I do mean anywhere --and you can access people who inspire you. You can try out whatever moves you artistically, and you can receive immediate feedback. It's collaborative. In short, it's hella marvelous for all artists, including writers!

In my real life, I have friends and I have family. What I was lacking before Twitter was people who understand me. The people in my real life love me, but when I get excited about a piece of art I see or a poem I read or an idea I have, they humor me. Due to "life choices", seeking out creative communities in real life was never going to happen, but on Twitter, I've found a group of people who understand that excitement about art and sometimes join in. As someone prone to some pretty major depression, that sense of being understood and being part of a community of likeminded individuals has been invaluable.

But I digress. Twitter as a creative tool. To prove my point, I've collected a few tweets (what the 140 character postings are called for non-Twitter users) that I do not hate that I've written. So what? Well, the 'so what?' is that these creative attempts probably would never have happened had it not been for Twitter and the collection of people on it. If you are a writer on Twitter, be sure to go back and look at what you've tweeted --chances are there are ideas that can be expanded or used. You will be amazed at what you find. Twitter is writing.

So here goes. All of them are copyright me, but Twitter is responsible for them. Thanks, guys.

In modern times, it's de rigueur To say your work's professional; I'll say it, though -mine's amateur & overly confessional.


we were unaware
a collection of habits substitute for life


all anger, no aim - shooting blanks at targets to hear the hollow bang


"Don't you remember?" "No." "How could you forget an orangutan playing the violin???" "Maybe he wasn't very good."



" ...so, in the end, all you're left with is an inflatable alligator, a credit card bill past due, & regret. Drink?"


I tried to pull myself up by my bootstraps, but I couldn't afford boots or straps. I floundered in my flip-flops instead.



I feel a tiny bit loose Drank wine, the color was puce Both purple & brown Made me smile not frown Hey! I thought it was juice!



Word of the day 'apologia' is an apology that's been writ - But unless followed up by action, I'm afraid it's not worth ...much.


Those were inspired by conversations with friends, #artwiculate, #1linewed, and #haikuchallenge. If you head onto Twitter and are a writer, be sure to check out those hashtags (no, those are not number signs --those are hashtags!). And I'm curious: how did you find your creative community?

award winner?

Recently, I entered a writing contest -& I won! It's a very strange thing to win anything. I don't think of myself as a winner. Nor do I think of myself as a 'loser' (too much of that word in the news recently!), but a winner? 

I try things. I try to write. I try to draw. I try to be a good person. I try to work with kids and their families. I try to be a good mother. But to succeed at what I'm trying? It's weird.

I know how to handle disappointment very well. If you want a model for how to manage failure, I'm your girl! I am tenacious. I learn from my mistakes. I can sort out constructive criticism from the other kind. I know when something is personal and when it's not --I have all of that sorted, no problem.

But winning? What do I do with that?

I have been sending out writing to various venues --albeit haphazardly, but I've been doing it --for ...going on two years now? About that long. A little poetry, queries about children's books I've written, ...things like that. 

Most of the time, there has been deafening silence. That I can handle now. In the beginning, it was confusing and rather off-putting. A couple of times, I got feedback. The feedback was useful both for improving my work and understanding how publishing works. There were the notices that someone else had won. I always read when other people won and tried to figure out what they had done that worked. 

All along the way, friends have read and given me feedback (mostly positive -whew!). They kept me feeling positive when the experiences I was having with the process of sharing my work with a wider audience didn't exactly tickle.

Now it's me. It's a little thing, but everything counts, good and bad. The story, "Melvin the Destroyer" (scroll down to October 2016), was selected as winner for the First Worldwide Flash Fiction Competition. Even odder, they paid me. I've never been paid for writing before. I have a full-time job that is very demanding --that I get paid for. But somebody paid me for something I enjoyed every moment of doing? I'm allowed to call myself a professional now? How does this work?

I think I've figured it out, and I'll share what I've figured out with you because I'm a compulsive oversharer.

I keep doing what I've been doing --writing and trying to improve my writing. I keep trying. I won't expect to win anything again because I might not (not giving up the day job!), but I keep trying because nothing happens if I don't try. I can't not write --this blog post is evidence of that. But I wrote for a long time before I showed anyone. I will keep writing. My voice and my thoughts are as valid as anyone else's. 

And everyone else's voice and thoughts are as valid as mine. I hope you all will keep writing, or drawing, or singing, or ...whatever it is that moves you, too. It's not about winning or losing --it's about communicating, because we all have things to share. Please keep sharing. The greatest award is connecting.       

satire: what the hell is it, & why does it matter?

SATIRE (n.): "the use of humor, irony, exaggeration, or ridicule to expose and criticize people's stupidity or vices."
-Interweb definition

On record: I love satire. It's one of my favorite forms of humor. I do love the ridiculous, & satire is all about the ridiculous.

One of the things that makes good satire so spectacular is that it is so very hard to do well. If you go too far in one direction, you get not at all funny; and if you go too far in the other direction, you get ...not at all funny. But that thin line? That razor thin line? Sublime perfection. Hilarious & critical at the same time.

Recently, a major publisher (*cough* Abrams ...*cough*) entered a bit of a media firestorm when they issued a series of book covers that they classified as satire. You can head on over to their website if you'd like to see what they classified 'satire'. I have not provided a link to the book covers, but I have linked their response to the criticism here (scroll down to comments to see responses to the statement to get more points of view on the issue). I recommend people see what is being discussed if you are going to form an informed opinion; I don't necessarily recommend buying the book unless you want to support them. I would not recommend showing them to children even though they look like children's book covers --that part of this we ALL agree on.

I tried to figure out what line it was that was crossed, why was there such controversy over the pseudo-kid lit, for my own edification (fancy word --just meant I felt like it). 

To do this, I turned to my favorite piece of satire ever written: Jonathan Swift's "A Modest Proposal". What made it so damned good? I don't think there's anyone alive who would contest how successful it was as satire. Are there any similarities with the pseudo-kid lit books? Are there any differences, as I suspect there are because of the reaction against them?

Certainly what is discussed is horrific in both cases: Swift talks about eating babies; and the pseudo-kid lit book covers talk about subjects like bringing a bomb as a gift to a birthday party and poor drivers injuring innocent bystanders.

Certainly both are dressed up in innocuous clothing: Swift is making a modest proposal --just a little idea he had to solve the problems of the poor in Ireland; and the pseudo-kid lit books are based on the graphics and writing style employed in children's books from a bygone era.

Certainly the topics being discussed are political in nature: Swift is discussing the human costs of poverty; and the pseudo-kid lit is discussing topics like terrorism and xenophobia. Neither really gets at the foibles of human nature, which is another subject of satire, so politics it is ...

Which brings us to the differences. And there is a major one.

In "A Modest Proposal", Jonathan Swift never comes out and says that he is supportive of the poor of Ireland, and that he represents the class that holds the power. He doesn't have to. Sentences like the following make it clear that he is the one who is the monster:

• "But I am not in the least pain upon that matter, because it is very well known, that they are every Day dying, and rotting, by cold, and famine, and filth, and vermin, as fast as can be reasonably expected."
• "Butchers we may be assured will not be wanting, although I rather recommend buying the Children alive, and dressing them hot from the Knife, as we do roasting Pigs."
• "A Child will make two Dishes at an Entertainment for Friends, and when the Family dines alone, the fore or hind Quarter will make a reasonable Dish, and seasoned with a little Pepper or Salt will be very good Boiled on the fourth Day, especially in Winter."

Really good satire requires the satirist to place him or herself IN THE SATIRE. 

Which brings us to the pseudo-kid lit book covers. The satire does not go far enough to be effective. It doesn't commit. This is why people who are offended by it are offended by it. Irony does not work in this circumstance. 

If Abrams and the author believe that xenophobia, Islamophobia, racism, etc. are wrong, then they needed something additional that is not there that makes it clear that these words and images on the covers cannot be interpreted at face value, because for better or for worse, there are people who will take these ideas at face value. They will find it funny, but for the wrong reasons. They will miss the irony. They will miss the criticism. They will see it as justification for acts of violence like we're seeing an increase of in the news now. 

Sad as it is, we live in a world now where people don't realize that the ideas in the artwork is wrong, and these people now have the bully pulpit of power. Satire works best when skewering the ideas of those who hold power, not confirming those ideas. 

  

I don't believe in censorship, unless it is in cases where people are being actively harmed (e.g., images depicting the sexualization of children, providing personal information about people's families). But I find these books to be irresponsible. I won't be buying them. I prefer to spend my money on satire that works.

____________________________________________________________________

Follow-up (as of 5 December 2016): Abrams has pulled the work upon the request of the creator. Here is their statement.

file under 'will never be published' (no. 9)

File Under 'Will Never Be Published' (no. 9): Shoes! Glorious Shoes!

I'm feeling super shallow tonight. It's Friday night and it's been a serious week. Serious is not what's needed. Too much serious going on. Forget serious! Shoes, baby!

Background: I love rhyming. I tend to think in terms of the sounds of words. Once upon a time, I studied Phonetics and Linguistics, if you require proof of my love of speech sounds. When I write, I think about every word in terms of how it sounds with the words around it. Rhyme makes me happy. Yes, I'm a dork. I'll own it.

Well, I love rhyme, but apparently, it's not very fashionable. I wrote this piece thinking, "What fun! Surely a book about shoes will be snatched up by children's publishers!"

Uh, no.

There's this curse, seldom mentioned outside the realm of children's literature --not so much a curse as a double-edged sword: 

On one side of the sword, we have Dr. Seuss and all he contributed to the world; but on the other side of the sword, we have Dr. Seuss, against whose work your work will always be compared and found lacking, if you write rhymes for children. If you are thinking about getting into writing for children, you should know about this unspoken truth and keep it in mind.

Dr. Seuss is personal hero of mine. I know I'm not as good as him. I also know that my personal writing preferences include both rhyme and writing for children. So what do I do?

I try my best, and I do it anyway. I'm not him. There was only one Theodor Geisel, and it ain't me. Would he be so shallow as to write about shoes? Probably not.

But I would!

This will never be published because 1) rhyme's not currently cool, 2) I'm not Dr. Seuss (who is thought to be cool, yet rhymes --figure that out!), and 3) well, you'll see. I went way overboard with the theme --and I would do it again! 

Shoes! Glorious Shoes!

Shoes! Those shoes!

Those glorious shoes!


There are so many shoes

from which we can choose!

There are boots for the rain;

There are sandals for sand;

There are sneakers to wear

On your left or right hand.

(No, there are sneakers for feet

When it’s time to compete


In a really fast run


As you sprint down the street. )

There are boots for the snow;

There are platforms for shorties;

There are clogs to slip on


For your tired Over-Forties.

There are ski boots for skiing,

And hikers for hiking,


And walkers for walking,


And bike shoes for biking.

There are heels for spouses

To wear with their blouses

And, maybe, a pair


Of some really nice trousers.

Dancers tap on their tappers,

They ballet en pointe;

Queens can put on


Any shoes that they want.

There are sensible flats;


Mary Janes that are fancy;

There are shoes that hold on

When you start feeling dance-y.

There are boots –look at these! –

That come to the knees


Of big, burly lumberjacks

Cutting down trees.

There are spikes just for golf,

And house slippers for slipping;

There are shoes with loose laces

That seem made just for tripping.

There are specialty shoes


That are made for prosthetics;

There are a wide range of shoes

That are made for athletics.

There are shoes in all colors:

Red, green, oranges, and blues –

There are so many choices


That I really can’t choose!

Shoes, so many glorious shoes!


There are so many shoes from which we can choose!

Sometimes, though ... Sometimes,

I find –just for fun –


The best shoes we can choose

Are when we choose none.