famous person says ...

Please stand for our National Anthem ...

Okay, you don't really have to, for a couple of reasons: 1) I'm not sure which country you're reading this in; and 2) even I were to play the National Anthem of any given country, you wouldn't hear it anyway because this is a blog post and you are reading and can't hear what's going on here. Please remain seated (or lay down or stand on your head --whatever you like).

I was merely referencing current events. No, not the current events about threats to the end of humanity or ongoing war or natural disasters. No, not those. I was referring to football players choosing to protest inequities by not being present for or kneeling for the National Anthem of the United States prior to football games. Some people see this as disrespectful to a variety of things including the United States, U.S. Veterans, and Donald Trump.

Feel what you like about this issue, but I am very intrigued by one criticism that keeps popping up.

These players gets paid millions of dollars to play football and they're lucky to be able to do that and receive that salary. Somehow, this means they're supposed to not say anything because the system, as it currently stands, benefits them. They have fame and fortune, so what do they have to complain about?

A similar criticism is leveled at other celebrities of all political persuasions who have political opinions. The assumption is that they are abusing their position by stating their beliefs, and that somehow they are unqualified to have opinions on the basis of their participation in the arts or sports.

Here's the thing: they are citizens, too.

Are they in a peculiar position? 

Absolutely. People listen to them --lots of people listen to them. 

Does that mean that they cannot have or state their political beliefs? 

No. 

And what makes them qualified to have political beliefs? 

I would respond to this question with a question. My question would be, what the hell kind of question is that? 

Are you? Yes? 

Am I? Yes? 

Then why on Earth would they be any different?

Like any other citizen, one would hope that the politically-minded celebrity would educate themselves on the issue they are interested in. Sometimes, they don't.

Guess what, though: we do that, too. And it is up to us, not them, to consider how we form our opinions. They simply get the issue publicity by virtue of choosing to speak publicly. It is up to us to decide if we agree or disagree by seeking out additional information. It doesn't mean they shouldn't speak their mind. Freedom of speech applies to all citizens.

I personally am happy to live in a place where all citizens are encouraged to participate in political discourse, be it for the status quo or against it. I am encouraged that people who are in otherwise very comfortable positions choose to deflect some of that glory onto people who don't always get heard. I am thankful for nonviolent protest because it shows us where things aren't working or where we need more dialogue.

Anyhow, you can agree with what a famous person says or disagree with them --just like you can with your uncle or coworker or stranger on the street corner. Their opinions hold no more importance than any of those other citizens, and I think that's where confusion comes into the situation.

Civic engagement can take many forms, and that's a good thing.

the Proust questionnaire (no. 2)

Next up, we have my friend Tela. She lives here in the U.S. (but on that other coast), and she is pretty amazing. She is a small business owner (technically, you are, Tela!) who grooms dogs.

I'd like to apologize for the bands that show up in these Proust interviews. Apparently, Blogger has issues with copying and pasting. Still good content, though! Get to know Tela ...



What is your idea of perfect happiness? 

Walking hand-in-hand through life with a partner who loves me as much as I love him.

What is your greatest fear? 

Failure


What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? 

My insecurity 

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

A judgmental, arrogant attitude/outlook that makes them believe they are always right.

Which living person do you most admire? 

My two sons. They have been through so much in their young lives and are still so willing to love. 

What is your greatest extravagance? 

My hobbies, show dogs and art supplies

What is your current state of mind? 

Unsure about myself and my future

What do you consider the most overrated virtue? 

Beauty

On what occasion do you lie? 

To spare other’s feelings or to avoid conflict

What do you most dislike about your appearance? 

My weight. I wish I was skinnier.

Which living person do you most despise? 

I don’t despise anyone, at least not that I can think of.

What is the quality you most like in a man? 

The ability to be in charge but not overbearing, as well as self-controlled, and intelligent.

What is the quality you most like in a woman? 

Quiet confidence and intelligence

Which words or phrases do you most overuse? 

I’m not aware any at the moment. Whenever I become aware of phrases or words I am overusing, I stop using them.

What or who is the greatest love of your life? 

Dogs and drawing are my greatest passions. As for who is my greatest love in life, I think it’s too soon to answer that question.

When and where were you happiest? 

Most recently was the times Jeff and I were together. Everything before has been so shrouded in tragedy, I can’t seem to remember my “happiest.”

Which talent would you most like to have? 

I have always wished to be able to write comedy

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? 

My timidity

What do you consider your greatest achievement? 

Not so much an achievement but having the privilege of being the person allowed to walk with my late husband through his illness and death. (There may be too many words in that sentence, but I don’t know how else to convey it)

If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be? 

A turkey vulture. They have the best life…gliding through the sky, nothing bothers them, food just laying around.

Where would you most like to live? 

I would love to live in a mountainside cabin

What is your most treasured possession? 

My pets, my art supplies, my iPad, and my car

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? 

Never finding love again

What is your favorite occupation? 

The occupation I most admire is medical doctors.

What is your most marked characteristic? 

Compassion, gentleness, and patience

What do you most value in your friends? 

Understanding and acceptance

Who are your favorite writers? 

I really don’t have a favorite writer

Who is your hero of fiction? 

Not so much a “hero,” but my favorite fictional character is Winston Smith in 1984. I identify with the way his mind works. He desperately needs to rebel, but is always aware of the risks and his ultimate fate….but he hopes, anyway.

Which historical figure do you most identify with? 

Job from the Old Testament

Who are your heroes in real life? 

The closest I have to a real life hero is my father. He is an Air Force veteran, a man of faith with a skeptical, scientific mind, and a sharp wit. He taught me to always think for myself, and gave me my sense of humor.

What are your favorite names? 

I like unique names.

What is it that you most dislike? 

I most dislike when people are cruel. Cruelty is never justified or necessary.

What is your greatest regret? 

Dating that awful boy in high school and allowing him to damage me so much.

How would you like to die? 

I would prefer not to die, but if I must, peacefully in my sleep.

What is your motto? 

Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control

the Proust questionnaire (no. 1)

Branching out today: 

I thought I'd try an interview because learning about people is something I enjoy. Being fundamentally lazy ...I mean, efficient, I figured I'd save myself a bit of effort and use a questionnaire developed by Marcel Proust, the French novelist. Why recreate the wheel when the wheel is already available on the Internet and it works quite well?

Today, for the inaugural Proust questionnaire (at least on this blog), I am interviewing Michael Topic, whom I have actually interviewed before in a different time called early 2016. The world was very different then. It will be interesting to see if his answers have changed. Michael is a creator (I don't know what else to call him!) who lives in the UK. So, here we go: get to know Michael.

1. What is your idea of perfect happiness? 

Having the ability to create without worrying about finances, with those I love near.


2. What is your greatest fear? 

Losing my creative abilities.


3. What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? 

The inability to influence people with new ideas they need.


4. What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Needless overcautiousness and conservatism. I also dislike heartless people.


5. Which living person do you most admire? 

Can't think of a single one. People in the public consciousness are often badly flawed - even the brilliant ones.


6. What is your greatest extravagance? 

Musical equipment.


7. What is your current state of mind? 

Jaded, but quietly determined.


8. What do you consider the most overrated virtue? 

Resisting change in order to look wise. That's just posturing, but at a horrendous cost.


9. On what occasion do you lie? 

When telling the full truth would be needlessly hurtful.


10. What do you most dislike about your appearance? 

My weight got out of my control because I blindly followed orthodox, official nutritional advice, which turned out to be pure quackery. I'm getting it back to healthy.


11. Which living person do you most despise? 

There are so many world leaders, corporate heads and authority figures that fall into this category.


12. What is the quality you most like in a man? 

Gentleness.


13. What is the quality you most like in a woman? 

Compassionate intelligence.


14. Which words or phrases do you most overuse? 

I'm blind to my own overuse of cliches. No idea.


15. What or who is the greatest love of your life? 

My wife and kids.


16. When and where were you happiest? 

When making music, wherever I get to do that.


17. Which talent would you most like to have? 

I wish I could cause positive change without so many people wanting to stop me at all costs.


18. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? 

My tendency to get snarky when highly stressed.


19. What do you consider your greatest achievement? 

Fatherhood.


20. If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be? 

Someone enlightened and wise.



21. Where would you most like to live? 

In a world that thought differently to this one. The obsession with money-making spoils everywhere.


22. What is your most treasured possession? 

My late father's snare drum and his favourite drum sticks.


23. What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? 

Feeling rejected and irrelevant.


24. What is your favorite occupation? 

Making and learning.


25. What is your most marked characteristic? 

Passionate enthusiasm.


26. What do you most value in your friends? 

Playfulness and loyalty.


27. Who are your favorite writers? 

I read so much, that there are too many to list, but also too few that truly stand out.


28. Who is your hero of fiction? 

I don't really believe in heroes, but I liked how the Hermione Granger character was written.


29. Which historical figure do you most identify with? 

Carl Sagan


30. Who are your heroes in real life? 

To me, there is no such thing as a hero, but I like people who tend to have moments of lucid insight and exhibit fearless integrity. Even heroes are vulnerable and human.


31. What are your favorite names? 

The names we gave our kids. We thought long and hard about those.


32. What is it that you most dislike? 

Greed.


33. What is your greatest regret? 

Spending so much of my life working extremely hard for arseholes.


34. How would you like to die? 

Peacefully


35. What is your motto? 

Imagine, invent, inspire, create, encourage, enlighten and edify.

happy birthday, vincent

Edna St. Vincent Millay is one of those people you read about and you think, "I wish I were that interesting ...". 

It is the anniversary of her birth today. 

A little background: she was born in 1892. Think about what was acceptable for women at that time. The expectation was be ladylike, get married, have children, and that was about it. She was raised by a divorced mother. She began writing and submitting poetry for publication around age 14. She endeavored to be a writer and make her own way in the world. It wasn't that she came from money --she didn't. That makes her adult life even more interesting. It's easy to push the limits of what's possible when you have a safety net. She lived without one and still walked the high wire.

One of her most famous poems --a very short one --is entitled "First Fig". Here it is in its entirety:

“My candle burns at both ends;
It will not last the night;
But ah, my foes, and oh, my friends—
It gives a lovely light!”

Those few short lines are a good summary of her life philosophy. 

A few years ago, I answered her poem with a tongue-in-cheek, "Second Fig". Part of me regrets that (I'll attach it below anyway, and you can be the judge). Living with the kind of passion and defiance described in "First Fig" is nothing to mock. It's something to be admired.

If you have time, check out her writing. As a poet, she uses words carefully and well. All of them burn, but they are not a difficult read. She expresses ideas clearly but doesn't sacrifice the beauty of poetic language. It's a perfect way to celebrate a great writer and an inspirational woman. Happy birthday, Vincent.

--





And here is the sensible alternative, "Second Fig". Should we be sensible? I don't know. Hers sounds like more fun ...

In response to Miss Millay;

I say not as foe, but friend;

Your light can shine another day –

Choose, and burn one end.

when it clicks (happy uplifting blog post)

Have you ever wanted to do Something and you don't know how? You try and it's all vague and foggy and doesn't turn out the way you want at all?

Stick with me. It gets better ...

You try again. You look for ways to do your Something when you can figure out where to look. 

You ask people for help with your Something. You forget what they told you because you have to remember so many other things that need remembered. You remember maybe one thing out of twenty things the people told you, and you try that one thing. It doesn't quite end up the way you hoped, though. Have you ever had that feeling?

Seriously, hang in there. The good stuff is coming ...

You try again, and the Something gets a little bit better, a little bit easier. Then, life decides you're trying too hard and gives you other things to do. Or the world takes over and you find yourself fighting to get out of bed. All of the work you did on your Something fades back into chaos.

Come on. You can do it. I promise -this blog post does not have many words. A few more, and they're good. It's worth it.

You try again. Maybe someone noticed and helped you make a concrete step towards your Something, whatever that is. Maybe you received the gift of time and energy. You try again and ...

It clicks. That Something you wanted, it clicks. It's close enough to what you wanted that it counts. The funny thing is, it all counts. Everything that came before the click? It's what got you to the click, so it all counts.

My Something (learning how to make art on a computer) clicked yesterday. It's been something I have wanted to learn. Am I perfect at it? No. Am I seriously impressed that I made that? It's as close to what I've had in my mind as I've ever come, and I love it.

My Something was helped along by many people, and one in particular (hey, Aaron!), gave me access to materials I didn't have access to before. My friend Deb gave me access to materials when I was trying to learn how to art not on a computer before (art is a verb now -I've decided), and that helped, too. That support made all the difference, and my Something would still be a source of frustration rather than a source of joy, if it hadn't been for them.

If you have a Something, be it creative or altruistic or personal, keep at it. If you know someone who has a Something they're having trouble achieving and you're in a position to help concretely, help them out. Thank you for reading to the end of this blog post -sometimes you have to wait for the happiness, but it's there if you stick with it.