the definition of love

First of all: Yeah, I can't define love either. But I'm going to try. At length. Using math. Full disclosure: I love math (there's that love thing again), but math has mixed feelings for me. I tend to get creative. 

Caution: Math ahead ...

Love means a million different things to a million different people. I started to do the math 1,000,000 x 1,000,000 (a trillion, incidentally), but then I gave up when I realized that the numbers representing love in the world today are actually more like 7,000,000,000 x 600, with 7 billion people in the world and each of those people knowing 600 people (okay, if they're Americans -that's how many people they know according to a small study cited in a New York Times article from 2013. I'm making this stuff up as I go, so give me a break). Can you love people you don't know? Sure. Can you not love people you do know? Sure.

My brain hurts. Let's move away from imaginary numbers and statistically-average people ... 

Philosophers have been thinking about love for a long time. In general, love can be felt in the following ways:

• Erotic love
• Friendship
• Love of family
• Altruism
• Flirtatious love
• Practical, or long-lasting, love
• Love of self

This is based on the Ancient Greeks. Of the seven types listed, six are love of the other, and one is love of self. We look outward with our love most of time, unless we are overtaken by narcissism. Some of the types are meant to last for the short term (flirtatious love, erotic love), while others are meant to last far longer (practical love, friendship, love of family).

I'm sitting here tonight, thinking about loved ones. I'm thinking about who I love, how I love, and how much I love. 

And I blame whoever decided to make Valentine's Day a big deal. I was thinking of not loving them so much. 

But then, I realized something: Valentine's Day should be about all of the love, and maybe I'm the one who's failing to recognize this opportunity. 

Love is not about numbers. It's not even about romance (except maybe sometimes). It's about having positive feelings about yourself and others, and sharing those feeling with others through words and actions. We need love. The more we see love in the world, the more it is reflected back on us; the more it is reflected back on us, the more love we see. It is cyclical, and it is beautiful, and no, I haven't been smoking anything thank you for asking. 

The definition of love is love. Look for it. Experience it. Share it. Whatever it means to you, if it is positive and not harmful, enjoy it.

Happy Valentines Day. I love you (and you, but not you ...okay, maybe even you, but only altruistic love, got it?).

❤️